Vacation Mindset

Reporting in. Day two of six. Marriott Ko'Olina Beach Club. O'hau, Hawaii. Incidence of vomit, zero. Bleeding boo-boos, zero. Sunburn report, mild on Mary's face. Let's face it the worst thing that has happened so far is that they took my favorite spring rolls off the lunch menu at the beachside restaurant. This is my seventh trip here. I realize that puts me into the officially spoiled rotten category. It started with just Bill and me. It was free. Bill worked for nwa and we had 1,375,233 Marriott points accrued. Then we brought the kids, then my mom, then my sister and her family twice, then just my niece and now we are back to the Kotrbas and Janel, my mom. After this year our Marriott account is tanked, flight benefits are long gone and I guess if we come back we will be saving and sacrificing like the rest of the shiny white Minnesota beach-goers.

What is a vacation mindset?

On the plane, I had two options. Anna Karenina. Elle magazine. Anna Karenina? Elle magazine? Russian literature. Pop fashion culture.

Emma Watson is really looking good these days. And did you know she went to Oxford? And, I now have 35 options for radiant skin.

Deep into Drew Barrymore's teaming up with Coach purses for the spring collection I turned the page and there was an article about our failures launching us forward. The subtitle of the article "Too many of us suffer from recurrent crises of confidence, even when we've achieved considerable success. Louisa Kamps (the article's author) examines the latest thinking about the paradoxes of perfectionism, fear of failure, and the potentially vast benefits of learning from our mistakes."

The mere fact that we have these articles in mainstream fashion publications is deeply comforting to me.

This article was complete with the Stanford research of Carol Dweck. Newbies, Carol Dweck is the Suzuki philosophy hero, author of the book Mindsets, in which she basically shoots down the theory of inherent talent and eschews the growth mindset-that with smart work we can all do what we want to do. This article even coined the term Dweckian, which I loved. It also featured insight from Megan McArdle's The Upside of Down: Why Failing is the Key to Success. McArdle says you must first give yourself "permission to suck." Then with hard work and concentrated effort you can build your skills.

But I really just wanted to know the best place to get a blow-out in Los Angeles. Now I'm thinking again about my debacle of Brahms in Houston. And other mistakes along the way.

Bottom line? Lacking confidence? Build competence. Take in the feedback. So, I'm delighted that I already have a plan. I'm trying out a new teacher. For me. Myself. And I. Going for a lesson. First time in 17 years. Heading down to St. Olaf college. If I'm going through with this teacher trainer application, I've got to feel 100% confidence about my own performing. Or at least 80%. There has to be room for growth if I'm to be a Dweckian.

After a small bag of peanuts and some ginger cookies, the next article in Elle was about finding the elusive balance between family, career and life. Heaven help me. I'm on vacation. There is no balance. . . 

I should have chosen Anna Karenina.
Second half of the flight I did sink deeply into the second Hunger Games movie with Calvin. Did you know Jennifer Lawrence wears Chanel lipstick.

What is the vacation mindset?  I don't know. But I think if I work very hard and keep trying I can achieve it. I started yesterday with a 25 minute "Spa by the Sea" massage. And I walked six miles. I wanted to walk nine, but again, we need to leave room for growth. Sleeping eight hours a night, albeit from 9:00 p.m. to 5:00 a.m. is a treat and an integral part of being a vacation Dweckian. Though I would do even better with nine hours. Used spf 30 when I should have used 50 on Mary's face.  Make blond braids very tight to avoid dreadlocks. Embrace your failures. Keep trying. I'm doing my best.

With a little more practice I'll be very competent at this vacationing thing. Because I'm a Dweckian. I can achieve a vacation mindset.

Aloha for now.