"Everything Changed. . . " part two

There is a corollary to the Story People quote, "Everything Changed the day she figured out there was exactly enough time for the important things in her life." The dirty little secret is that it runs both ways. What we make time for, is ultimately, what is important to us. That is, if we are living deliberately. If I clean my house instead of reading with my child or having coffee with a friend, I am at that moment in time, placing more importance on things than relationships. I'm working on that.

Nobody will look back on their life and wished they had surfed the web a little more. Or watched a little more TV or played a few more video games. Or kept the house a little cleaner.

I once asked my high school group to write down the things they value in order of importance. What I was taught way back in confirmation, was: God, Spouse (if you have one), children (if you have them), parents, friends, health, work, recreation, etc. . . This list will be different for each of us. Most parents would make a list for their children something like this: family, academics, spirituality, music, sports, scouts, etc. . . Again, this list will be different for each family.

Back to my group--I then asked the kids to write down how many hours they spent each week in each endeavor that they valued. I asked them to keep it private, I didn't want or need to see it. I asked them only to reflect on the value of the activity versus the time spent doing that activity. I wondered if they matched up.

I am not asking them to put piano first, although it sure would be great if they did. I'm only asking them to be thoughtful about their time. Periodically reflect. Every year through eighth grade I signed up for summer softball. I hated it. I desperately searched for four leaf clovers in the outfield. "Look alive Stephens!" Why? Because my friends signed up.

I happen to have a tremendous bias that music should be right up there at the top of the list. No other activity has the ability to touch our souls like music does. There is one more Story People poster that I don't have in my studio for obvious political reasons. . . but here it goes. . . and it doesn't have to be soccer. . . it really could be anything. . . it just so happens that piano teachers have to unite against soccer with humor. . . thanks Brian Andreas for saying it so eloquently. . .

"How'd it go at soccer? I said & he said we worked on fundamentals & I said like why you were even chasing around after a ball in the first place? & from the way he looked at me I figured out that was probably too fundamental."